Pursuit:
This was an ok piece. You kept an ok flow,
you express your feelings pretty
good. Your structure was pretty good.
You could have added some multies it would
have helped as well as better vocabulary.
This piece was simple in away however I kina
liked it, even though it was somewhat simple.
It is weird for me to like a simple piece like this
but keep droping so you can get better at being
more indepth and less at being simple.
Overall though you have potentail so don't
stop dropping O.M's.
Peace.