My Heart

[Ace of Aces]

My Heart

A Song for My Girl...

Intro:
I vowed to never hurt you, but those words fell through
As I held you to tell you to compel truth before I felt you
But in return, I burned the concern about my passion
I had you cry for the lies and times I felt dissatisfaction
In fractions, I broke our hearts into pieces with each
I'm displeased to beseech the times we reached defeat
But here they are, the parts of our heart that fell apart
And even after the shards, our love was forever,
from the start…

I made her cry today, it broke my heart in two halves
The very first time my perfection had fell into cracks
Compelled a new draft that imprinted a note to my soul
It was the same day that I felt my hope wouldn’t grow
And yet I hoped she would know that it hurt even though
It was my fault to begin with before she broke out below
So I soaked out my show, mistaking the truth for mishaps
Thinking that after failing it would increase the distance
Between us, separating both of our hearts into two parts
As far as blue stars that marked the start of new charts
But instead, we put back the pieces and kept the love
Only to be reminded about how dumb I’ve become…

I’m sorry, for breaking the heard words that I promised
I’m sorry, for all the broken moments I placed upon us
I’m sorry, for the rehearsed hurt I dispersed within me
I’m sorry, for not ending what I had since the beginning
And I’m sorry, for the tears that I made you shed for me
But know this, there’s one thing with me I will forever keep…

I made her cry today, it tore my heart to bits and pieces
Nothing there to compensate for my self assisted creases
Or my reasons, they were meaningless in the first place
Forever telling myself ‘that I would never lie to her face’
But for her sake, I kept it all a secret and didn’t tell you
Crying deeply inside because I emotionally felt bruised
I was compelled too, but didn’t and I hate myself for it
I regret these moments but I’m relieved you explored it
And so I sorted the imports of thorns that I capsized in
I trapped lies in but now let go of the pain I applied with
But you forgave me and forbade me for my stupid actions
And with the fire from our love they soon became ashes...

Outro:
So there we were, so far from the place that we had begun
Separated several times but we are still two hearts of one
This song is sung, from every lung of my heartfelt emotion
And I’m so happy to have finally put back what was broken
My mind was soaked in, an ocean of sin that devoured me
Only to be washed away by our love that’s overpowering
With this song I promise, and upon this it will last forever
I vow again to never hurt you for as long as we’re together
And that alones forever because my love for you is evermore
...I give my heart to you to cherish it through heaven’s door

[Ace of Aces]

Threads I Replied to:

Pandora's Triumph
Revolution Again

[Ill..]

wow very nice piece,

The main thing that stood out for me was the flow of the piece, i can tell you put in a lot of though into making it easy to read which help me enjoy the piece more, it never fell off, i might even say it was perfect!! ok you structure was also perfect, which made it even easier to read and understand!!

Your emotion here was well potrayed, i could feel the love you had for her and the regret that you felt when you made her sad:

I made her cry today, it tore my heart to bits and pieces
Nothing there to compensate for my self assisted creases
Or my reasons, they were meaningless in the first place
Forever telling myself ‘that I would never lie to her face’

the story telling was very impressive also, i underdstood it all the way though, it was very easy on the eyes to read, and that i like alot!!

vocab was also good, you didnt do to much or too little, it was just right!!

Fave line =

I’m sorry, for breaking the heard words that I promised
I’m sorry, for all the broken moments I placed upon us
I’m sorry, for the rehearsed hurt I dispersed within me
I’m sorry, for not ending what I had since the beginning
And I’m sorry, for the tears that I made you shed for me
But know this, there’s one thing with me I will forever keep…

so overall a nicely written open mic, in fact this is one of the best ones i've read in a while!! looking forward to reading more for you ace!! 9.4/10

Can you go vote on my battle with instramentals in front lines, its gettin mad slept on!! thanks man!!

pz

[Trahedy Siphon]

This was overall a great piece.
Flow was on point, faultless..
It was overall complex for the
subject that U chosen & Ur word
choice was good too.
Props 2 ya

[Ace of Aces]

^thanks, i appreciate it, keep'em coming. drop links.

[Ion Metatron]

Wow @ this nice piece indeed
Extremely touching for the fact it reminds me of myself in a sense.

My Favorite is How you started the verses like:

"I made her cry today..."

Geez.. that made me Feel bad about Ignoring my Girl when she cries & telling her to "go to the back room wit all that".

Sigh.. I have some apologies to make.

[Lingwistik]

yo man....this was a nice piece alltogether, i relly liked it

this was very compassionate and emotional, i can tell you worked hardon this so thats why its good the flow was very consistent, you didnt streatch any lines at all i dont think...the imagery was there as well, it puts pictures into my head so that kinda made it relate, this is very good, the vocabulary was good


overall nice piece

peace

[Truck]

Ace - I was feeling this joint man.. Good shit hommie..
Very nice!

[Ace of Aces]

^thanks to all. i appreciate it.

i'll drop some feed on yours in return.

[ILLunatic]

Now this was a dope piece
Flow was trumendace
a bit of wordplay..
Emotional status was heavy
Imagery was good as well
Everything was just great
very interesting read

I vowed to never hurt you, but those words fell through
As I held you to tell you to compel truth before I felt you
But in return, I burned the concern about my passion
I had you cry for the lies and times I felt dissatisfaction

That was a deep opener...

keep it up

[Endeva.]

i have to say i really liked this... it fit together very nice.... really got what you was saying over.... nice emotion.... these sorta drops are quite common, but still you got this over good.... built it up well... vocab wasnt too strong, but dont really need to be if your going on emotion.... props...

[Endeva.]

be a gentleman and peeps mine, since it aint gonna get posted in the tourney, cos i got the win, due to rules broken by mav, id rather it had jus went ahead, but....

[hardhitter]

dude i loved this it is so great and i know where your comeing from cuz it explains like me and my girl to.

i really loved reading this it was the greatest i have seen in a very long time.
last good peice i have read was one from Mad MIKe and that was a lil bit ago but i deff like this peice the most its my all time fav.

very good job hats off to you bro.

keep this dope writeing up
peace

[King Prospect]

I loved this man, it made me think about how I've been treating KayCee...It made ,e realize how bad I've been treating her, I just need to call her right now and apologize, I really love her but I still hurt her.

Two thumbs up man, two thumbs up.

[Dios de Hip Hop]

nice peice. someone nominate.
well worded thought thru and
hope that shit works out with
ya chick. The chorus thingy
is pimp. i liked it first two lines
of it too. Nice emotions nice word
choice in soome parts but other lines
you could have worded better :/
nice peice.